


Forward Reconnaissance

by Ambitious_Rubbish



Series: Miscellaneous Miscellanea [7]
Category: Stardew Valley (Video Game), Stargate SG-1
Genre: Gen
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-09-16
Updated: 2020-09-16
Packaged: 2021-03-06 17:02:50
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,454
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/26492359
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Ambitious_Rubbish/pseuds/Ambitious_Rubbish
Summary: Trip through the gate. Doing recon on a new planet. All in a day’s work for SG-1. And yet, something about this particular world just seems… off.Given all the things the Stargate program’s flagship squad has seen in their travels, the fact that they considerthisweird, probably doesn’t bode well.
Series: Miscellaneous Miscellanea [7]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1910671
Comments: 4
Kudos: 8





	Forward Reconnaissance

“Carter to SGC. SGC, please respond.” Carter shook her head and clicked her radio off. “Nothing, Colonel. I can’t even make contact with the MALP. We must be getting some EM-interference that’s blocking our transmissions back to Stargate Command.”

Jackson quickly glanced to his left, then to his right. The place appeared normal enough: a quaint, if rather sleepy little town, set amidst some idyllic countryside. It looked perfectly… ordinary. And that was sort of the problem. The fact that it was normal was… abnormal. One moment, they’d been in a sand-scorched desert, being buffeted by harsh, hot winds. The next, they were standing in the middle of some grassy knoll with a handful of rustic looking buildings just a short distance ahead of them. Daniel removed his glasses, pinched the bridge of his nose, and sighed. “Anyone else getting a weird feeling of Deja Vu?”

“I told you not to eat those eggs,” said O’Neill.

Daniel rolled his eyes. “Jack, I’m serious. This place… it reminds me of P7J-989.”

Sam caught on right away. She snapped her fingers, the memories flooding back. “Right! The Gamekeeper’s Chair.”

“The what-now?”

“You remember, sir. P7J-989? We came out of the gate into some kind of wasteland, but just a little ways ahead, everything was lush and green. But nobody seemed to live there. That is, until we found that everyone on that world was in suspended animation – their brains connected to some kind of virtual reality interface run by a caretaker of sorts.”

Jackson shook his wrist and frowned down at his watch, which seemed to have stopped working. “He – the caretaker, I mean – or should I say ‘it?’ Well, whatever. It made us relive a whole bunch of ugly memories so that it could give the planet’s residents something new and ‘interesting’ to experience. Well, this place is a lot like that.

“Yeah, not sure it’s ringing a bell, Daniel.”

A deep voice rumbled from behind the three of them. “I believe, O’Neill, the phrase you used was ‘we nearly got our brains sucked out by an alien La-Z-Boy.’”

“Ah. Yes. Right. That.”

Just then, a figure emerged from one of the nearby buildings. He saw the four new arrivals, and while he found their clothing very unusual, he simply assumed that their attire was the new fashion from… wherever it was they’d come from. More pointedly, he didn’t seem at all bothered when said newcomers immediately trained what had to be weapons of some sort on him. “Hello there!” the man said, his voice a little on the raspy side, as befitted someone of his advanced age, but still quite jaunty. “You must be new to Pelican Town.”

O’Neill raised his own voice just enough that it would carry a little better over the sounds of birds calling to each other in the distance. “We are. We’re definitely new to these… uh, to these parts.” He adjusted the brim of his cap and did his best to look less unthreatening, despite the fact that he was holding a submachine gun at the ready.

Again, though, if the older gentlemen was at all bothered by the boxy P-90 being pointed in his direction, he didn’t show it. “My name’s Lewis. I’m the mayor here.”

The four members of SG-1 traded surreptitious glances.

“Well, it’s nice to meet you. I’m Dr. Daniel Jackson, this is Colonel Jack O’Neill, Captain Samantha Carter, and Teal’c. Where did you say we were again? ‘Pelican Town?’”

“That’s right. The nicest town in all of Stardew Valley. Well… ok, the only town in Stardew Valley. But it’d still be the nicest even if there _were_ other towns.”

Daniel smiled a placating little smile. “Of course.”

“Anyway,” Lewis continued on. “We don’t get very many visitors around these parts, but you’re still more than welcome. I’m sure the rest of the townsfolk would be happy to make your acquaintance.”

“What townsfolk?” Sam muttered under her breath. There wasn't another soul in sight.

Jack, however, didn’t bother attempting to be quite so tactful. He cocked his head to the side and speared Lewis out of the corner of his eye. “You do realize you’re in the middle of a desert, right?”

“I beg your pardon, sir?”

“A desert. Really hot, no water, lots of sand – gets into everything. Desert.”

“The nearest desert is many miles to the west. Our local bus driver has a route that passes out that way, but I’m afraid you’re too late to catch her. She leaves fairly early in the mornings.”

Carter scratched her head, still pitching her voice low so that only the rest of the team could hear. “Sir, this is starting to get really weird.”

Jack met her comment with a mildly derisive snort. “Starting, Carter?”

“Are you folks quite all right? You seem to be a little upset about something. Could I perhaps show you to the saloon? Maybe have a cold drink? Sit a spell? I’m sure Gus would be pleased for the business, and he’s quite the accomplished cook.” Lewis began walking towards them.

O’Neill lifted his gun and gestured emphatically with the barrel. “Ah, ah, that’s close enough there, fella, thanks.”

Most people would probably have been at least a little bit concerned at this point, but Lewis seemed perfectly at ease despite having had a firearm waved menacingly at him. “Oh, I’m sorry. I just thought you’d like me to walk you over there. Pelican Town isn’t all that particularly large, but like any town, it’s got its little nooks and crannies that can get you lost if you’re not careful. It wouldn’t be very mayorly of me to let guests get all turned around, especially seeing as they’ve just arrived.”

Jack offered up his best attempt at an ingratiating smile. It came out looking more like a wince. “That’s uh… very neighborly of you and all, but I think we’ll find our own way if you don’t mind.”

Lewis shrugged. “All right, if you’re sure. The saloon is that way.” He pointed. “And the general store is just a little further ways in the same direction, in case you need some supplies. Tell Pierre I sent you. Oh, and if you need me for anything, my house is towards the south of town.” He jerked a thumb over his shoulder. “It’s the one with all the salmonberry bushes lining the path.” And with that, he was gone, leaving SG-1 to their own devices. Not that they were at all sure what they would do next. Or, at least they weren’t, until Carter pulled her nose out of one of her many gizmos.

She motioned down at the little device’s screen. “Colonel, I was right about the EM. I’m picking up some kind of polarizing radiation over to the southeast. It’s only a few hundred meters away. I’d like to check it out.”

Daniel pointed. “… uh, Sam? I think… I think that’s probably it over there.”

The team, with Jack on point, hurried over to where Jackson had pointed, and found themselves standing in front of an enormous statue. A relatively haphazard attempt to conceal the thing with shrubbery had been made, but it was too large and shone too much to be hidden very effectively. Jackson mused that it looked to be crafted out of gold, and Carter commented that it was probably made entirely out of the precious metal. The statue had begun to sink into the soft earth underneath its base, leaving clear indentations in the ground.

“What IS this?” Jack said, shaking his head in disbelief.

Daniel, meanwhile, had gone in close to examine the statue’s intricacies. “I don’t know, but it does bear a lot of the hallmarks of ancient Egyptian construction. As to what it’s doing here, well, I think Sam’s probably more qualified to handle that one than I am.”

The most she could muster was a small shrug. “Honestly, it beats me. It’s definitely the source of that radiation I detected. Levels are too low to be harmful to people, but other than that, I really don’t have a clue what it’s supposed to be. You know, other than decorative.”

Lewis suddenly appeared behind them. “Well, actually-”

O’Neill shot him in the chest.

Carter looked at the mayor’s crumpled body with wide, disbelieving eyes. “Colonel! You shot him?!”

He shrugged. “With a Zat...” he said, as if that made everything better. He deactivated the little snake-shaped pistol, and it reverted to its more compact form.

Daniel sighed. “Jack, we could’ve interrogated him.”

“And have him confess that he’s a Goa’uld?” O’Neill rolled his eyes. “I could tell that from the ridiculous mustache.” He looked to Teal’c for confirmation.

The Jaffa nodded. “Indeed.”


End file.
